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Just because it's anal sex doesn't mean you have to take it from behind. In fact, for some women, doggy style can be the most painful position, since it's reportedly the position where men can penetrate the deepest.

For your first time, Block recommends lying on your back with a pillow under your butt, similar to a comfortable missionary style. You can also try it while spooning, but be prepared for some awkward falling out and re-adjusting.

Although the vagina is self-lubricating, the backdoor unfortunately doesn't have that same luxury. Silicone lube is your friend since it will last the longest but if you're using a condom, go with water-based lube, which won't break down latex.

The more you use, the more slidey, glidey, easier, and less painful the experience will be. Encourage your partner to pay close attention to your clitoris, nipples, neck, and anywhere else that feels good—as these erogenous zones can help distract from the pressure you're feeling in your booty.

Let your partner know how it's feeling—the good, bad, and ugly. United States. Type keyword s to search. Today's Top Stories.

Getty Images. You may be able to find the same content in another format, or you may be able to find more information, at their web site. Related Story.

Unlike the vagina, which comes to a full stop hi, cervix , the rectum keeps going into the abyss of your GI tract. A flared base will keep any toy firmly rooted on the outside of your bod.

Then, have your partner remove it. Re-lube it, then insert again," suggests Dr. Repeat this technique of slow-in, slow-out five or six times, or until you can completely insert the toy.

If it feels good and comfortable, continue. Why does it take so long? Because your anal sphincters are a muscle, like your biceps.

Exercising them increases your ability to flex and relax them on command. Similarly, "It would take a lot to stretch [the anus] to the point where it couldn't come back," says Van Kirk, such as regular use of extremely large toys.

Though, "You might just relax after the first time having anal sex, which makes it feel like it's gotten bigger.

If you don't have a toy on hand heh , anal fingering is a good option. This will help your partner learn how your anus works, anatomically.

BTW, did you know that being afraid to finger yourself is actually quite common? Generally, one finger is more than enough.

There are no awards given to whoever can get the most fingers inside! Goldstein notes that "long or jagged fingernails can lead to localized injury.

And just like you don't want Cardi B. Hold up: the intestines? When a penis is incredibly long or going incredibly deep during P-in-V sex, you might feel the sensation that it's hitting your cervix.

For anal sex, there is an anatomical equivalent. Hey, the more anal sex facts you know You feel it, you like it, you want it? You got it.

If you and your partner have comfortably prepared for anal sex this far, pat yourself on the back bum , grab the lube and get at it—slowly. There's a long list of best anal sex positions , but for your first-time, doggy style, missionary and lifted missionary , and spooning are best.

Also read up on tantric sex, which is all about going super slow. You'll likely find that your muscles relax as your heart rate slows.

As your partner is filling you, play with other parts of your body that bring you pleasure at the same time, she suggests.

Your partner may also lend a helping hand. More on this below. No matter what, follow the golden rule of butt sex: If it's painful, stop.

It's that simple. It should never hurt," says O'Reilly. But because HPV, herpes lice, and crabs can be contacted through skin-to-skin and pube-to-pube contact, she and Dr.

As if you needed another reason to use protection, here's another important anal sex fact: you can technically get pregnant from unprotected butt sex.

Second, keep in mind that after the enema is about 1. Ensure that there is no soap in the enema, as this can cause more irritation. Most importantly, only use a small volume of water you can try the little bulbs that are sold in drug stores to clean out your ears.

If you try to clean high up, the water will mix with the stool. This can fill the rectum with liquid stool, running the risk that you will have a messy experience.

Toys present an excellent way to prepare and relax before intercourse, but they can easily cause trauma if used incorrectly, and even spread infections if shared.

Passing them back and forth between partners without thoroughly washing them can spread STIs. Opt for softer latex toys that are much less likely to cause trauma than ones made with more rigid materials.

Rimming can provide some lubrication and helps the anus relax before sex. That said, rimming can put both partners at risk for STIs, so be careful.

Dental dams may be used as a protective barrier to minimize the risk of infection, but can obviously be awkward to use.

Condoms are the best barrier against STIs, though their efficacy can vary depending on the type of infection.

Condoms are unfortunately less effective for STIs like herpes, HPV, and syphilis, which can be spread by skin-to-skin contact.

Even if you are consistently using condoms, PrEP can serve as a valuable backup if you are at even a minor risk for HIV exposure.

It is very important that you get your PrEP from a healthcare professional who is comfortable prescribing the medication, who you can find by using our Lighthouse doctor search function.

I have heard of individuals getting Truvada on the streets and this is a terrible idea. Second, it is important that your doctor checks your kidney function and other lab tests every few months.

This reflex is more pronounced in uncircumcised men, and will make bottoming more painful and difficult. Gently allow penetration to the point of minimal discomfort.

Within a minute, the sphincter will relax and the penis can be slowly inserted fully. After anal sex, shower normally with a gentle soap. Clean the outside of the anus very gently — do not attempt to scrub.

Do not use enemas, including soap suds or Fleets. Get tested for STIs every three months if you are having anal intercourse with more than one partner, and every six months if you are monogamous.

You can easily find a gay-friendly or gay-identifying doctor through Lighthouse to avoid negative discrimination or stigma. When bottoming hurts, it could be that your anus is anatomically too tight or you are unable to relax, which is oftentimes a psychological response.

Enemas increase your risk of acquiring infections, including gonorrhea, chlamydia, hepatitis and even HIV. Additionally, among subjects who performed 50 or more enemas in their lifetime, there is a trend for increased risk of anal dysplasia which can lead to anal warts and anal cancer.

If you just read this paragraph, rolled your eyes, and still plan to use enemas, there are steps you can take to mitigate the risks. Second, keep in mind that after the enema is about 1.

Ensure that there is no soap in the enema, as this can cause more irritation. Most importantly, only use a small volume of water you can try the little bulbs that are sold in drug stores to clean out your ears.

If you try to clean high up, the water will mix with the stool. This can fill the rectum with liquid stool, running the risk that you will have a messy experience.

Toys present an excellent way to prepare and relax before intercourse, but they can easily cause trauma if used incorrectly, and even spread infections if shared.

Passing them back and forth between partners without thoroughly washing them can spread STIs. Opt for softer latex toys that are much less likely to cause trauma than ones made with more rigid materials.

Rimming can provide some lubrication and helps the anus relax before sex. That said, rimming can put both partners at risk for STIs, so be careful.

Dental dams may be used as a protective barrier to minimize the risk of infection, but can obviously be awkward to use.

Condoms are the best barrier against STIs, though their efficacy can vary depending on the type of infection. Condoms are unfortunately less effective for STIs like herpes, HPV, and syphilis, which can be spread by skin-to-skin contact.

Even if you are consistently using condoms, PrEP can serve as a valuable backup if you are at even a minor risk for HIV exposure. It is very important that you get your PrEP from a healthcare professional who is comfortable prescribing the medication, who you can find by using our Lighthouse doctor search function.

I have heard of individuals getting Truvada on the streets and this is a terrible idea. Second, it is important that your doctor checks your kidney function and other lab tests every few months.

This reflex is more pronounced in uncircumcised men, and will make bottoming more painful and difficult. Gently allow penetration to the point of minimal discomfort.

Within a minute, the sphincter will relax and the penis can be slowly inserted fully. After anal sex, shower normally with a gentle soap.

Clean the outside of the anus very gently — do not attempt to scrub. Do not use enemas, including soap suds or Fleets. Get tested for STIs every three months if you are having anal intercourse with more than one partner, and every six months if you are monogamous.

You can easily find a gay-friendly or gay-identifying doctor through Lighthouse to avoid negative discrimination or stigma.

When bottoming hurts, it could be that your anus is anatomically too tight or you are unable to relax, which is oftentimes a psychological response.

Many people have had negative bottoming experiences in the past or simply have a fear of the unknown, rendering them unable to relax their anus and enjoy safe and pain-free anal intercourse.

Some people are simply tighter than others — and some penises are larger than others — which can make anal intercourse more painful.

For either problem, I suggest trying dilators. Available in medical supply stores, dilators provide a safe and secure way to become more comfortable with anal sex.

Start small, leave the dilator in place for 10 minutes three times a day, and use the same size for a week. Dilators help with psychological fears by preparing you more for what to expect, giving you total control over your body, and erasing any fear or embarrassment in the eyes of a partner.

Physically, they allow the sphincter to accommodate a penis over time and should help bottoming get easier. If for any reason anal sex remains painful or you notice the appearance of lumps, bleeding, or an ongoing itch, see a healthcare professional immediately for a thorough anorectal examination.

Despite the fact that both men and women have been engaging in anal sex since the ancient Greeks and probably long before that , there remains, in many circles, a stigma attached to it.

Because when it comes to bottoming — or any part of your sex life — no subject should be taboo. For a lot of women, just hearing the words "anal sex" can make them clench their cheeks and change the subject quicker than they can say "no, thanks!

But it's , people! If it feels good and you like it, what's with the negative stigma around a little lovin' in the booty hole? Newsflash: Anal sex can feel good, ladies.

Your anus is full of sensitive nerve endings that can make your orgasms so much stronger and more amazing than just a normal O, says Susan Block aka Dr.

Suzy , PhD, sexologist and owner of the Dr. Susan Block Institute. Remember girl, this is your body and you are fully in-charge of what happens with it.

It's great that your S. Incorporate anal play into your masturbating sessions, suggests Block.

After all, you're the only person who knows what feels good and what doesn't. To get your body revved up, you have to get your mind right.

So breathe deeply and relax, and think sexy thoughts as you're exploring back there. When you get to the point during your touch-yo-self sesh when it starts to feel really good, you'll have a better idea of what to try with your partner.

And as for the hair sitch? Totally up to you, girl. As a kid, my father used to always tell me that if you look good, you feel good—and while he definitely wasn't referring to the grooming habits of my asshole, I think it totally still applies.

If you feel sexy AF completely waxed, keep your bald eagle shining. If you feel like a boss beyotch au naturale , then that's your prerogative.

If you're confident about the way you look down there, you'll be more likely to relax and enjoy the sensation you're feeling—regardless of whether or not you have a little hair in your crack.

There are times when alcohol makes sense—like, when you're ripping shots on your 21st birthday or drowning out your conservative uncle's political views during Thanksgiving.

But your first anal sex experience is not one of those times. If you know anything about the digestive system, you know it's probably best to not try anal sex right after you've housed a Chipotle chicken and cheese burrito.

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